Passing time

Wee Scottish Granny and her brother George were sprawled out in the lounge – a sofa and newspaper each. I tried to persuade them to come out for a breath of fresh air but fear immediately kicked in that someone might steal their sofa when they left so they decided to stay put.

I left the room listening to them shouting out headlines to each other, Uncle George started with the sports section, Granny was pointing out grammar mistakes.  Neither one was listening to what the other was saying.  By the time I came back Granny was calling out random names and Uncle George was replying, “No hen, I dunnae kenn that wan”… It took me a while to work it out but I realised Gran was reading out the names of people listed in the obituary!


Me: I can’t believe you are going through the obituary!

George: I dunnae kenn why ya laughing, I need to kenn who I dunnae need tae speak tae when I get hame

Gran: Do ya kenn Helen Mitchell?

Uncle George: Aye, I kenn a Helen Mitchell but I dunnae think she’ll be deed, she’s younger than me

Gran: Well it isnae her then coz this wans elder than you

Uncle George: That’s good hen coz I like Helen


The things these kids do to pass the time…


About Politely Insulting

I'll be writing random stories about family, friends and unsuspecting peeps.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Passing time

  1. Ann says:

    Buy them a phone directory – they can update it as they go through the obits!

  2. Akelamalu says:

    It’s worrying when you read someone’s obits that is younger than you! 😉

  3. Rob says:

    I’ve hardly a minute to spare, but I knew I could come here for a bit of laughter and I was not disappointed! Thank you 🙂

  4. thesmittenimage says:


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s